How to build a Coaching Persona to grow your skills, team and career

“OK, Tell Me What You Mean When You Say Nervous?”

It was a lightbulb moment—I realised I was naturally bringing my coaching skills into my corporate role.

In the past, I wouldn’t have picked up on subtle cues—certain words, shifts in body language, or even changes in tone. I was probably too focused on wrapping up the call. But since starting my coaching journey, I’ve developed confidence, curiosity, and a deeper awareness, all of which have propelled me forward—not just as a professional, but as a person.

Here are my top five coaching tips to help you build your own coaching persona—so you can grow your skills, your team, and your career.

1. Embrace the Silence

When there’s an awkward silence in a meeting, it’s human nature to want to fill the gap. But here’s the secret: silence is powerful.

Those five seconds of quiet may feel like five years, and you might be itching to say something. But hold your nerve. Wait for it…

And then, like magic, someone will speak up:

👉 “Actually, I have a question…”

Give people the space to think and process. Silence is where the best insights emerge.

2. Ask How, What, Who, Where, and When Questions

Want to avoid the advice trap and empower your colleagues? Stop telling. Start asking.

Whether you’re problem-solving, brainstorming, or just working through the day-to-day, use open-ended questions to spark awareness and collaboration.

🔹 What would success look like?

🔹 How could we achieve the overall goal?

🔹 Who can help us with this?

🔹 Where should we go next?

🔹 What’s needed to complete this piece of work?

The right questions lead to better thinking, better solutions, and better teamwork.

3. Reduce the WHY Questions

Sorry, Simon Sinek—but I have to disagree.

Think about the last time someone asked you why. Maybe it was your teenager. Or maybe it was your manager.

How did it feel? A little defensive? A little accusatory?

That’s the thing about why—it can put people on edge. It often sounds like blame, even when that’s not the intent.

Instead, reframe your questions:

❌ Why wasn’t this work done?

✅ I noticed the deadline was missed—what’s going on? How can I support?

❌ Why are you worried?

✅ What’s causing the worry?

❌ Why can’t you do that?

✅ What do you need to get this done?

You’ll get more honest answers, better conversations, and stronger connections—without the unnecessary tension.

4. The Most Powerful Two-Word Question: “Anything Else?”

Human beings are complex. We rarely say what’s really on our minds the first time around.

That’s why two little words—“Anything else?”—can make all the difference.

By asking this simple follow-up, you:

✅ Dig deeper and uncover more insights.

✅ Avoid assumptions—because the first answer is rarely the full picture.

✅ Encourage real conversations instead of surface-level responses.

Try it. You’ll be surprised by what comes up.

5. Be More Observant in Meetings

It’s time for the All Cameras ON revolution.

Virtual or in-person, start paying closer attention to what isn’t being said as much as what is.

Look out for:

👀 The fidgeter. When do they start? When do they stop? Do they even realise they’re doing it?

🎤 Tone of voice. Is the usually energetic team member suddenly quieter?

🔄 Repetitive words. If someone keeps repeating something, ask: “I hear you saying X a lot—what do you mean by that?”

😐 Facial expressions. Someone might be saying they understand—but does their face match?

The more you observe, the more you can pick up on what really matters.

Final Thoughts: Coaching in Action

Developing your coaching persona takes time and practice.

✅ Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

✅ Say less and ask more.

✅ Encourage face-to-face interactions.

✅ And remember—you don’t have to start with why.

If you found this article insightful, I’d love to hear your thoughts! Drop me an email: lucy@lightsparkgroup.com